As everyone who shares a work fridge knows, when the economy gets bad, people start stealing your snacks!!!! It's True!! You underground gold miner lovers out there who don't share kitchen facilities at your office might think I'm crazy or miscounting my cookies, but I swear I'm 100% serious.
Every day when I pack my lunch I also pack snacks to get me through the mid morning, mid afternoon, and that home stretch at the end of the day. In one plastic bag I put a chocolate chocolate chip granola bar for a healthy morning snack, in bag #2 I put a Ding Dong or Ho Ho for a lunch desert, and in bag #3 I put five chocolate chip cookies as a treat for not eating anything from the snack machine before 3:00. (I also have three cup o' noodles in my file cabinet just in case I need that extra boost and don't have any change for the snack machine.)
For the last week or so, when I go to get my cookie snack, there has been between one and three cookies missing. I have put up signs and told my boss but nothing seems to stop this cookie thief. Doug says I should make some cookies with ExLax in them to teach the guilty person a lesson, but making it so that someone gets paid to poop at work doesn't seem like a punishment to me.
I just hope this economy gets better so I can do my work without keeping one eye on the fridge. Especially since people are talking about layoffs. The last thing I need is to have to go on job interviews. Especially since we got closet moths and all my good dresses are full of holes. What was God thinking when he invented those little guys? How is that design intelligent?
On the opposite side of the spectrum from the moths would be one of God's most magnificent creations; a hot underground gold miner named Chuck. "While the mines of Alleghany are classic examples of drift mines, exploration by the successful operator has not been aimless. With the exception of LUCK - a great aid to any mining venture - a purposeful direction and goal are the main ingredients separating the winners and losers. Those who succeed in winning nature's gold have maintained a firm hand in steering their courses."
Keep steering your courses toward those hot bodied underground gold miners!!
President Pro Tem